Naturally Black

Be Inspired...

2011-04-04T15:52:00.003-04:00

Let this inspire you this month.

The successful person has the habit of doing things failures do not like to do. They dont like doing them either, necessarily. But their dislike is subordinated to the strength of their purpose.

“How I see it
Anything you wanna be you can be it
If your mind can preceive it
And your heart really believe it
Then you half way there and all you got to do is do it
And if you give it all you got there ain’t really
Nothing to it” – Dead Prez

“Everybody look at you strange say you changed
Like you work that hard to stay the same “ – Jay-Z

happy New Year

2011-01-04T12:48:00.000-05:00

Well well... Happy New Year to you all. May this year bring about fulfilment of your many dreams and aspirations. I am not so into resolutions, why wait till a new year to do what is necessary to make your life better? That's just me. But its a new season. The old year is gone and you have a new one to make some good plans. Plans, not resolution. There is a big difference. Make some goals, what do you want to accomplish. Set some objectives, they help your goals to get accomplished. Set timelines to have them done.

Areas you may want to consider:
Finance, health, spiritual, education, career, physical and charity. Relationship and social.

In all this areas, what fulfilment will you want to have by the end of the year? Be sure to reward yourself as you go along.

Pity-Party

2010-10-26T06:22:00.000-04:00

In life you just need to trust God and stay expectant.

The Forgotten Landmark

2010-10-23T17:40:00.003-04:00

PS - Almost dropped the link. Been a crazy day.

Nigeria at 50, Day 22 – Another Shot http://dollchic.blogspot.com

The Forgotten Landmark

According to Wikipedia, a landmark means a geographic feature used by explorers and other to find their way back or through an area. Other definitions put it as “an event marking a unique or historical change”; “a recognizable natural or man-made feature used for navigation”. Other definitions have “landmark” as the actual name of an object, which symbolizes the previous definitions. Could it be the owners of these objects: a skyscraper in Abu Dhabi, a mall in China and a condominium in Canada, had in mind a bigger statement or a reminder to the observer how grand their new project will be. I began to wonder what landmark, a guide to our past, or navigation for our future do we possess in Nigeria to help us move forward.

We, the citizens of Nigeria, are explorers searching for our past glory days to be more glorious in our future. Our country once a giant is now a dwarf, once a trigger now a dud. We have forgotten the most famous landmark linking our past to our future. It has been hiding in our national anthem all along and we have missed it. Arise O’ Compatriots Nigeria’s call obey. The call is to serve our Fatherland, and to serve we must be servants. We have, however, become a nation of many masters and mini-governments of our own. An average Nigerian today provides his own electric power, water supply, and security either directly or through a means we pay for. We serve ourselves from our political leaders who claim to serve us but got fat in the process, to the lay man on the road buying yet another gallon of petrol or diesel for his generator. We serve our selves not our Father’s land.

A master dictates, and the terrible ones rule with hard hands, but a servant serves putting the needs of the Father Land, first. Our landmark has not put us on a journey without direction. We must serve with Love, Strength and Faith it demands. With the spate of kidnappings so rampant, a bombing on a joyous day, and selfishly selling our rights to decide a better fate for quick riches, we do this not in love. Love is an out ward expression and not for personal gain. In love, and not a romantic one for that matter, you actually do care for the needs of others. We look out for the helpless and cater to our fellow man. The Good Book tells us that “faith is the expectations of things hoped for”, we then must expect that things get better, because then and only then do we become better ourselves. We must have faith that each one of us can change and in so doing, start to change ourselves. With strength, we put in all that we can and never tire until we see the changes we are working towards. A slogan I heard back in the 80s was “if you are a manager manage well, if you are a governor govern well.” The slogan has called us to do all that we can where we are with what we have. When you go to work, whatever your position be the best at it, be the best driver you can be, the best LASTMA agent you can be, the best police officer you can think of. Challenge yourself to do it better and differently matching towards perfection.

We are called to be all of these because without the effort of some before us we wouldn’t be here today. Who were the ones before us? Sadly most of us do not know or have forgotten. In other countries little children no more than 8 years old can tell you of those that have impacted their countries birth. The American history classes are filled with stories of bravery of their forefathers and what they accomplished. It gives them a sense of pride, which is what I believe we will gain if the labor of our heroes past is not done in vain: Herbert Macaulay, Obafemi Awolowo – it is reported that Nelson Mandela asked of him when the former was released from prison -, Dr. Nnamdi Azikiwe, Tafawa Balewa, Efunroye Tinubu, etc. They fought that this country may stand as did countless others who did not sit down but stood up to the powers that be of their time. Will they be happy if God gave them a glimpse of this country as it were today? We have to educate ourselves, if the current educational system wouldn’t do it, of what they did and why, perhaps we will see why we need to make a turnaround in this situation we are in. Their labor has been in vain, sadly.

It is not too late for us to make a turn around and do what is right. By our individual selves, we can start to make amends.

In the second stanza of the older national anthem, Nigeria We Hail Thee, it states “And this we count as gain / To hand our Children / A banner without stain.” Our parents did not hand us an unstained banner and they did not count Nigeria then as gain. We are not handing our children an unstained banner either. Tell me, have we not forgotten out Landmark?

If we go back to our forgotten landmark, each one of us in his own private place, this country is bound to rise again. The map has been written out for us, we have our own made GPS system that does not direct what greatness is, but how we become great just by arising o’ compatriots and obeying Nigeria’s call. It is all about our attitude towards this commitment of serving our Fathers’ Land.

Nigeria at 50, Day 24 – Freaksho http://redoje.blogspot.com

I started thinking...

2010-10-05T07:24:00.001-04:00

Older women are given the same excuse to date younger men that older men give to date younger women. So sad.

On FB this morning, I saw Independence Bomb Blast; IBB for short, get it? I keep thinking it is weird, if MEND did plot the bombing, that they are doing it in Abuja. Is that some type of statement. Now, the SSS arrested Dokpesi IBB's (this time Ibrahim Badamosi Babangida, you are too funny) campaign director. They said his name was on one of the phones belonging to a suspect. How dumb is this...? If IBB did do it, and I am not saying he did, will he send Dokpesi? Is he trying to trap GEJ or is GEJ trying to trap IBB? Is GEJ demonstrating his quiet strength or is he just clueless?

I am wondering who trained our SSS Nigeria's version of the FBI-cum-CIA? How do you get intelligence like so and not do something about it, now you are arresting random people to show some teeth. Too late dont they think. And we have a new Head of Intelligence, HOI. I read his profile: head of this, head of that, he worked here and there, did this and that, but nothing on his resume says he can handle this work he has been given. No concrete tangibles on this is what he accomplished, he arrested 28 terrorist all by himself, or uncovered a mystery, neither was a there something pointing to his future abilities other than well he worked in some intelligence outfit that to me did nothing still.

One of them days...

2010-10-04T06:56:00.002-04:00

This was written yesterday, Sunday.

It was one of those days today. Should I go to church, should I not... wound up going. And what do you know, Wande Cole walked behind me for like 3 blocks from parking lot to church gate and it was all lost on me. I have heard his name, heard the music, but until yesterday didnt know what he looked like. So I caught sight of a friend on the church shuttle going towards church, we waved and made a note to wait for her when I got to church, yes I walk fast. I noticed other girls on the bus were cheesing. Some guys rushed up behind me and I took a cautionary look, you know assess the threat. See I started martial arts and needed to practice on some unlucky fella see if I am learning anything. I just saw 3 guys, looking like they need to get away or move closer, so I noted their position behind me.

Well on my way, another friend was a passenger in a car facing opposite my direction. I smile waved but something she did confused me. She must have seen Wande after me because she cheesed too, which got me confused thinking she wanted to exchange a few words. I didnt know Wande was behind me. But I noticed she was strugling not to move her attention and not to leave mine either so I keep walking. Another cautionary look behind me, making sure the now 2 guys dont get any ideas. Well we 3 walked into church gate and I saw him sort of relax. I dont know how the name Wande Cole got to my mind, but sounded like a whisper. Is my mind making things up or did I hear it. I try now to talk to him, as I am all relaxed but he was rushing. So I asked a stupid question: Why are the people smiling and happy to see you? I did tell you it was stupid. It got his attention and he just said "I dont know" with that innocent face of someone who was caught red handed in the cookie jar. So I asked his name or something else, which he denied again.

My friend's shuttle pulls up and I ask her 'did you see the person that was behind me?". Without missing a beat she just said "Yes, Wande Cole." Oh somebody shoot me. Dude is probably thinking to himself "who is that psycho?", but I brush it off. But had I known it was him, I have decided never to be star struck again. It never leads to forever friendship. Yeah but I rub shoulders with stars like that on the daily. Ask RMD, we were standing side by side a few days ago. Doubt he knew I was there... oh well.

But it got beter after that... So I hung with my friend outside church during the third service. It was so packed we late comers had t wait till the forth service. We chatted some outside, compared notes, we had not seen each other in a while, then she had to run. I walk around, used the restroom, blew my nose to pieces. For some reason I am leaving and decide to go blow my nose some more. Good thing I did bacuse a few seconds earlier than that I would have missed running into another friend. I am walking and bam ran into her after like 3 months, we chatted and she said something about basketball at some place by my house. I am sore right now but I will sleep good I know that. B-ball was gruesome. Then continued my walk and ran into another dude from high school. Will someone just hand me a million dollars already.

In my head this morning this post sounded better. But I have decided that to get into it, I will post even if it looses the steam from brain to paper. But the whole point is sometimes you gotta go with the flow. Let the force lead you. I am now connected with 3 people from my past and that Wande Cole story has been a good anecdote for lulling conversations. I mean imagine... you are talking with someone, conversation is dying and bam...

Guess who was walking behind me the other day...
Clueless look.
Yes Wande Cole. Didnt even know it was him, because I dont know what he looked like.
Are you serious?
Hell yeah. But he should have recognised me too, I am a star in my own little world..
Hahahaha, yes in your little world..
So what happened..

and well you get the point. People love stories, get good at telling one.

Nigeria’s Golden Age

2010-09-30T09:50:00.001-04:00

‘Tis been 50years and the road has been quite long, join us as we celebrate Nigeria’s Golden Age at oluSimeon www.simeoneomobaba.blogspot.com on 1st October, 2010

Funny

2010-08-26T07:35:00.000-04:00

A Corper's Diary - Day 3.

2010-07-07T17:54:00.000-04:00

I want to blog about my Corper time at camp but these drills leave a brother drained plus been up at 3 am because some guys shower all night is just not the bizness. It is day 3 and I am getting used to it all, quickly too.
Registration was a pain in the butt. You would have thought they would evolve but the same thing my friend complained about years ago is still going on. Filled out 4 forms requiring the same information at 4 different stations. It was all rowdy and the Corpers are not acting like we are here for life development. But it sure is nice.
It is hard to be a student who studied abroad which also includes those who studied in close by countries. Though you would think we all went to America to study with the way peeps talk about it. And there is this animosity that exists with everyone thinking we are getting some form of special treatment like been allowed to leave camp. If only. And I am called a foreigner in my own country. Damn. I was so sure this is the last place I would be called that. Let the discrimination stop. I and a friend who studied in jand (London) spoke with this lady who didn't know we studied abroad. The vile coming from her towards students who studied abroad stretched a mile and the whole time we were nice, made her laugh and tried "on behalf" of foreign students to clarify her biases. She thought we were different in how we looked at them. Then at the end she asked where I studied, I toyed with her a bit then told her California. Oh my word, you could have blown her away witha rappers doo-rag. Now she blushes when she sees me. I think she is awed by my presence. Hey, it has to be something.
3 days down, 18 to go. The drills are crazy, muscles I didn't know I had are hurting mad. My neck damed about gave up this afternnon. But my posture is damned near perfect thanks to my platoon commander.
No doubt you would here statements like "if you are in your room, you are wrong." Best sing son ever from our military attachments. Sneaked up on unsuspecting core members and screamed "if you are in the hall talking, you are wrong." They quickly dispersed before they noticed I almost pee'd on myself laughing. It has its good sides but I still have issues with been up at 3 am because some guy has to shower earley for no reason. I hope to bring you sweet jists and detailed happenings. But these tiring drills and a BB keyboard are not the bizzness.
Ha, my roomie thinks I should use my Cali slangs and accent to swoop girls on camp. Hmmm.

Goodnight Yardy...

2010-05-06T03:40:00.002-04:00

Remember the killer of desires... Death.

I was getting into bed, it's been a long day and I am reminiscing as I lay down, unwinding. The phone rings and its my friend telling me the president is dead. I am thinking, we are going to have a riot, I could see the broken bottles embedded in some innocent guys bowels, a stick flying straight at its target, the police blazing their guns, tear gas and hot water through armored thanks. It will be gory I thought, then she said Musa Yar Adua is gone. Oh, the President not the Acting President. Either way, death is no good, but as the Americans are wont to say, "Two things are certain, death and taxes."

For those who may not know, Musa Yar Adua was the president of Nigeria. In the last few months, he has been plagued with Pericaditis and he has died many times over and again. Goodluck Jonathan his vice president was chosen to lead in his stead amidst many other controversial interpretations of the constitution. Goodluck as his name implies has been lucky climbing the ladder of leadership. His good luck according to those who have reviewed it, seems to have led to his superiors been ousted one way or the other.

As Yar'adua Passes on, I can only marvel at the power of death. We meet with roadblocks everywhere we go, and those with determination are surmountable. Death puts an end to all things. The plans, the ideas, the proposals, and all intentions. Death not only creates an absence or parts us spiritually - a common prayer in my language, Yoruba, is "We will not depart in the spirit" when you wave goodbye at the end of the day - death takes away an ideal, it takes away the expression of the individual. For what is life if not lived through expression of whom you are.

But nature always recycling itself. A new expression was given for that taken away. I wonder at what life the replacement expression will lead in life.

Well Yardy, that's what I call him, do rest in peace. At least now, no one can keep you silent no more, control access to you or keep exclusive rights over you. You are free my man. You know what it is for the body to rest.

Hi

2010-05-05T15:05:00.003-04:00

Out of ideas.
No... Actually full of it
Cant seem to pen them down
As soon as I start
There goes my gas

What would you do?

2010-02-09T07:13:00.004-05:00

What would you do is a series this guy writes about every now and then. Gets you thinking really and sometimes you get to know you, sort of.

The post below I got from here and thought my readers could figure it out. It was just interesting.

Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighbouring (British spelling) kingdom.. The monarch could have killed him but was moved by Arthur's youth and ideals. So, the monarch offered him his freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer and, If after a year, he still had no answer, he would be put to death. The question was: What do women really want?

Such a question would perplex even the most knowledgeable man, And to young Arthur, it seemed an impossible query. But, since it was better than death, He accepted the monarch's proposition to have an answer by year's end.

He returned to his kingdom and began to poll everyone: The princess, the priests, the wise men, and even the court jester. He spoke with everyone, but no one could give him a satisfactory answer. Many people advised him to consult the old witch, For only she would have the answer. But the price would be high as the witch was famous throughout the kingdom for the exorbitant prices she charged.

The last day of the year arrived and Arthur had no choice but to talk to the witch. She agreed to answer the question, but he would have to agree to her price first.

The old witch wanted to marry Sir Lancelot, The most noble of the Knights of the Round Table, And Arthur's closest friend! Young Arthur was horrified. She was hunch-backed and hideous, had only one tooth, Smelled like sewage, made obscene noises, etc.

He had never encountered such a repugnant creature in all his life.. He refused to force his friend to marry her and endure such a terrible burden. But Lancelot, having learned of the proposal, spoke with Arthur. He said nothing was too big of a sacrifice compared to Arthur's life. And the reservation of the Round Table.

Hence, a wedding was proclaimed and the witch answered. Arthur's question thus: 'What a woman really wants?' She said, 'Is to be in charge of her own life.'

Everyone in the kingdom instantly knew that the witch had uttered a great truth. And that Arthur's life would be spared. And so it was.

The neighbouring monarch granted Arthur his freedom. And Lancelot and the witch had a wonderful wedding.

The honeymoon hour approached and, Lancelot, steeling himself for a horrific experience, entered the bedroom. But, what a sight awaited him. The most beautiful woman he had ever seen lay before him on the bed. The astounded Lancelot asked what had happened.

The beauty replied that since he had been so kind to her when she appeared as a witch, She would henceforth be her horrible and deformed self only half the time. And the beautiful maiden the other half.
'Which would you prefer? She asked him. 'Beautiful during the day .... or at night?'

Lancelot pondered the predicament.
During the day he could have a beautiful woman to show off to his friends, But at night, in the privacy of his castle, an old witch! Or Would he prefer having a hideous witch during the day? But by night a beautiful woman for him to enjoy wondrous, intimate moments with?

(If you are a man reading this...) What would YOUR choice be?
(If you are a woman reading this) What would YOUR MAN'S choice be?
What Lancelot chose, is given below:
BUT... make YOUR choice before you scroll down below and answer in the comment area... OKAY?

Noble Lancelot, knowing the answer the witch gave Arthur to his question,

He said that he would allow HER to make the choice herself.

Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all the time.. Because, he had respected her enough to let her be in charge of her own life.

Now... what is the moral to this story?.
..

The moral is...
1) There is witch in every woman no matter how beautiful she is !
2) If you don't let a woman have her own way, things are going to get ugly.

So, always remember:
IT'S EITHER 'HER WAY' OR IT'S 'NO WAY' !!! not that I accept this conclusion

As far as passion goes

2010-02-04T07:33:00.002-05:00

I am having to take some exams in June in relation with my NYSC stuffs. So here I was in Economics class and I am not sure I ever enjoyed it so much. The dude tutoring me was just shooting information from the top of his head I got super dazed. And cockily replied my questions, "its something I have been doing for years." Oh really?!

While he took off, I could only just think of the many applications of Economics. It is a social science anyway, what other social behaviors can it be applied to and what other sciences can derive a new nature from it. The possibilities are endless as I considered my field of Computer Science and how a little Economics application can do it some good. Perhaps, if NASA Engineers were not so crazy smart they could look at Space Engineering from an Economics (as an application, not a study) perspective. I once read an article on relationships where the guy explained it using Economical Bell Curves; it was rather interesting though it dealth more with supply and demand of sex based on certain factors.

Thinking while listening, I think I left the class spiritually speaking. My mind was a thousand light years away. I got to think perhaps studying more of Economics could change my world view, give me something new to worry about. A new hobby of sorts and being able to look at problems or nations/economies and having a ready practicable theory to back it up. If nothing else, it makes for good conversation for the enlightened or atleast I can follow other conbversations. Which got me into thinking...

I have been interested in Human Psychology for some time now. I have read a couple Psychological thrillers or where some form of Psychology was used as a plot in a book. I wouldnt remember the titles now... What got me interested in them is a lot like how I am suddenly feeling about Economics. The application of Psychology in my everday movement. Looking at people and deciphering something about them, predicting their intent, or understanding something about them better. More fun actually helping them understand themselves, not that I want to.

What has this got to do with anything, if you know any good Economics and Psychology books, novels, articles let me hear about it. This is my passion for now, what I feel like feeding on. As far as books go, I graduated from John Grisham, Sidney Sheldon, Michael Crichton (actually I have read every novels they wrote). I was digging law at one time. It was just more expressive than I thought it would be, the thinking on your feet, defending someone who did wrong from a point of view that acquits them by saying "yes he done it, however..." Awesome. Brilliant.

The ultimate thing though is when I can write for my field of study using the concepts of Economics, I really doubt - not impossible - that Psychology of writing computer code will make any sense.

Lazy Friday 2

2010-01-29T08:22:00.002-05:00

Lots to do but not feeling up to it.

Decode: 370H-SSV-0773H

What is the missing number:

Lazy Friday

2010-01-29T07:27:00.002-05:00

So the bosses have been gone the whole week. Everyone should be busy but nope, its play time and no one is complaining. This was sent to me:

A quick brain tickler (no formulas used)
Please look at the Math below: Why do we spell it Maths.
They say only people with an IQ of 120 and over are able to figure this out.

If:
2 + 3 = 10
7 + 2 = 63
6 + 5 = 66
8 + 4 = 96
Then:
9 + 7 = ????

Please DO NOT Watch this...

2010-01-19T08:14:00.003-05:00

This is actually funny, but you may not want to watch it.

If I wasnt so lazy...

2010-01-18T07:03:00.002-05:00

If I wasnt so lazy, I would blog like everyday, perhaps every two hours (is it possible to have forthour as per fort night). Yes I have so many ideas raging in my mind but too busy reading other blogs or driving through Lagod traffic. Speaking of which, I do get ideas and full written text versions in my head but for the wheel, I cannot write it down. And I cannot pull over to put down some of my thinking. You see, we have no shoulders on our roads, you are either driving or driving. You have to see it to understand.

Anyway, I left my computer for like the last three hours now I am lost in thought.

Anyway, over Christmas, there was an abundant supply of snow in the US so they could not move around. We had a shortage of fuel in Nigeria, we could not move around. So if you ask me, life is definitely fair. Which brings us to Abdulmutallab, the Nigerian Terrorist. I think correctly it should be the British Terrorist as he was not a home grown bomber. And Nigeria got black listed. I am sure Britain breathed a sigh of relief. After British born (correct me if I am wrong) Andrew Reid did exactly the same thing, Britain did not get tagged as anything. And we all know they are suckers for America, and I am not sure what they did exactly to turn out all glorious but who cares.

So Nigeria is a country of terrorist even though our only fight is in house (Niger Dealta anyone). I wrote a series of letters to Mutallab but citing the first few words of this post you know he didnt get them, and they were going to be open letters too, should he happen to have Internet access and reads this blog. A lot of people are mad at him. I think he is one of those born genius who get out of school and need some real challenging thing to do. All the pent up aggression and energy that would have gone to sports, hitting on the honies, and other wild crazy adventures/fun that his books could not burn out, was a tool for our dear friends in Yemen to utilize for their own ideas. Life.

If I wasnt so lazy, the endless possibilities. Hopefully I will get around to writing on some new passion, and ideas. Like say the upcoming elections and what you can do about it; marriage and why I am so hesitant (psst... it has to do with all the books I have read on relationship and why marriage is such a bad idea), me, you, life in Nigeria, my environment and whatever else my little mind conceives.

So tell me, if you were not so lazy what would you do? Perhaps you are not even lazy at all, what have you done? And, cheat sheet for me, what would you like to read about? I am accepting requests. Try my mind.

for a dancer...

2009-12-19T17:32:00.000-05:00

To all those who left us too soon.

"For a Dancer," by Jackson Browne.

I don't remember losing track of you
You were always dancing in and out of view
I must have thought you'd always be around
Always keeping things real by playing the clown
Now you're nowhere to be found

I don't know what happens when people die
Can't seem to grasp it as hard as I try
It's like a song I can hear playing right in my ear
That I can't sing
I can't help listening
And I can't help feeling stupid standing round
Crying as they ease you down
cause I know that you'd rather we were dancing
Dancing our sorrow away

Keep a fire for the human race
Let your prayers go drifting into space
You never know what will be coming down
Perhaps a better world is drawing near
And just as easily it could all disappear
Along with whatever meaning you might have found
Don't let the uncertainty turn you around
(The world keeps turning around and around)
Go on and make a joyful sound

Now Your Struggle Continues

2009-11-02T15:49:00.003-05:00

Last Friday, one of the guys in the office I work asked about my preparations for NYSC. I kidded with him about wanting to give me something (money) to enjoy my adventure with. He looked puzzle and said “don’t you know that now your struggle continues.” It didn’t take long to figure out he twisted the meaning of NYSC, and perhaps may be I had heard it somewhere sometime. He, in any case, didn’t want to defeat that purpose of continuing my struggle. How nice of him.

Well, struggle or no struggle, I am here wondering how all those going to Camp, NYSC orientation period of 3 weeks, are preparing. I wonder if they are looking to the fun times they will have, the new friends they will make, or how quickly they want to get it over with. The smart ones are wondering why I am not. It is okay if you did not wonder, you are bright but other things are on your mind.

Well, I am being visited by sins of the past. Something about credentials and such. To think I once had a chance to sort it all out but felt it shall pass away. Alas, this is not passing away and I can only wonder what would have been. Imagine all the people I have told I will be going off to camp and hoping it would be in Lagos, and now having to tell them, “err, no I ain’t going no more.” It is not so bad, but I am already tired of explaining and the pity look. And I was so looking forward to going to camp. Not with all the stories I heard, and the previous comments I got on my previous posts. You all whet my appetite. I was looking to take it by storm and move on to the future promised all the returnees as we are called. Never mind, I already figured out it was fairy tales in some cases.

While currently appealing, who am I kidding, the cabbie who dropped me off at the airport read my demeanor and he said, “Oga, don’t worry everything happens for good.” Wow, some people are just immensely wonderful. That straightened me out and I looked forward to what I can do to pass away effectively the next year, because if I don’t make the February batch it is a long road ahead. He did tell me his story though. He got into an accident and his cab was totaled, then the at fault driver refused to pay and the police were not helping much. It became a court case.

Somewhere along the line, he got a loan from the bank and couldn’t pay back and they haunted him back and forth for theirs. A friend who had been telling him come tomorrow, and tomorrow he says come tomorrow, finally gave him a time to come. In the meantime, his fiancé whom he was set to marry in December, bailed on him. How is that for stepping on a man when he is down?

Well, he went to his friend who gave him the key to the cab he drove me in; it was not his to keep. What he didn’t realize in all his troubles was that the day he got his car, was also his birthday. A text from a friend alerted him to the latter. Then the court case was cleared and he was compensated, and a project he was not paid for was suddenly paid and he paid back the back which actually gave him some peace previously when they saw he really couldn’t pay. Everything he said was back to normal, just the way it was before the accident occurred. Everything except now, he is without a fiancé which he said was the greatest part of the story. In his down time he had a chance to think and learn from his predicament. He saw things that pointed to him going in the wrong direction especially with the lady. I can tell you he was relieved.

So I heard that story and I smiled to myself. What is one year? I can weather it. Though I still wonder what the feeling is if I were getting ready for camp tomorrow. Think about it though, I don’t get to clear the nonsense I am in by February, I have to wait till next August, and then another year in the Corp, and two years is gone. That was my threshold to see how far I would have gone in Nigeria. That was when I should be taking stock, reviewing/assessing my time in Nigeria. More so, I was thinking the camp will revitalize my social life. I have no clue what is going on in Lagos. Thank God for Theater@Terra though there is no bar and everyone leaves immediately.

So my struggle continues. I read a book once; A Setback is a Setup for a Comeback. I suppose I can practice what I read in it. I am the comeback kid. Does anyone know what it feels like the night before camp? I think most people are worried about getting to camp early so they can be registered and get their uniforms in the right sizes. A friend said they gave some girls guy clothes because they ran out, and some people wore sizes that were either over or under theirs. Who wouldn’t want drama like this? Nigeria we hail thee.

Crappy writing...

2009-11-02T03:37:00.000-05:00

Nigeria Jaga Jaga

I remember well when I first heard this song, light years after it had filled the airwaves. I was never one to keep up with popular culture, pardon me if you see me excited about some new slogans when the rest of the world has caught on to something new. Why am I asking you, you are online and would never come to my rescue when I make my gaffes in person? Oh well, moving on.

So I heard this song and did enjoy the beat much. Very up and bubbling, if I say so myself. It sure got my hard core frozen muscles moving, however involuntary it may have been. Well most didn’t like the song. “Why use such words to depict a country?” I heard most people ask. Mind you these are people who have used worse to describe or reference Nigeria. Some would go at length to describe their fellow Nigerians as “those Nigerians.” Pardon me; are you not one of them?

The song did describe Nigeria in many ways. The happening and the not happening. Being in Nigeria is a different reality for me, as visiting and looking around is very different from living and experiencing. Much of my observation wouldn’t matter which way you view it. If grace flows from leader to follower, it is a must that grass (or crass) flows from leader to follower or is it the other way around. Case in point: our football teams. I think it has been run much the same way the Nigerian Government has been run.
Here I must offer a disclaimer: Federal agents if you continue to read, you agree that you cannot hold me to any of these words.

Our football matches of recent have been played abysmally. We played well in the news print from every assurance that we will beat Tunisia for the World Cup berth, to how we will win the Under 20 World Cup as well, and the verdict is out on if we will be the first host team to win the Under 17 World Cup. It’s all on paper; read the dailies. We have high-caliber players yet, nothing happened. We are missing the fundamentals of a game everyone thinks we should have mastered. Even the US, a relatively new comer to the world stage have picked up some valuable skills and may one day dominate the sport, and who knows take over FIFA.

To wit (I like grammar) every time I see our preparation for soccer, I see a lot of things wrong with this country of ours. No one knows what is wrong and those who do are pushed to the rear. Everyone makes promises and you wonder if what they see and reality are all illusions to you. We played Germany for the opening of the Under 17 World Cup, and no doubt the boys did some magic. They sure came back, but somehow I think the penalty they got was their good luck charm. The sports commentator, someone I have met stated the “German team have played together for 3 years.” They were not scraped up and expected to perform wonders; they were prepared and it showed. We on the other hand thought our boys were privileged to play and therefore must bend over backwards to earn it.
We have leaders who may or may not be qualified to perform their jobs well. I speak no ill of them, but can you at least read up on what your position is and stop parading yourself as one without clue. It is a dead giveaway. When an IG of Police comments that Nigerians think solving crime is like watching a movie, instead of actually taking steps to solve the crime, what sense does it make? To him? To you? If it cannot be solved in an hour as depicted on CSI Miami, how many days have you had to solve yours? Come to think of it, in CSI Miami or any crime solving movies for that matter, it takes more than the length of the movie. Through the wonders of film editing, they cut it down to an hour or two. Think about it for a minute. Bad Boys I and II, featuring Martin Lawrence and Will Smith, the character Mike Lowry even had time to romp a bodacious lady in Tea Leoni and … Even my man Martin, had time to romp his lady too, and kiss his children good bye. That does take time doesn’t it? So Mr. IG –in case you are reading don’t quote me on this – a movie, in its own reality, spans days and is then compressed into an hour and half showing us the highlights and interesting/gory parts.
I could go on, but it is all fuzzy to me now as I write it down. I am sitting here in the darkness, on a charged laptop battery from the ever noisy, air polluting, diesel guzzling generator – I am not complaining – in a country capable of powering half of Africa or so I heard. The other day I listened to my friend solve the problem of electricity and yet no light. Perhaps you have to.
So I am done rambling. Forgive me while I get back into the grove of writing. It has been a long minute.

THESE ARE ODD:

Driving down the 3rd mainland bridge, as I pass by the turning to Oworonshoki, I see a bill board by Bank PHB quoting Jack Welsh saying “If you don’t take over your destiny, someone else will.” Really? Is that how they summarized what CBN has done to them? They mismanaged their destiny and now Sanusi has taken it over for them. I bet they didn’t see that coming.

Again, I saw people running off the streets when they saw a cow being herded by a lone man. I remember the days they used to have three men control a cow; cows these days are soft. Anyway, it made me wonder if you run off the street from a “harmless” cow, how come you see a crazy driver barreling at you and you dare him to hit you with his car? Only in Lagos.

3 Weeks

2009-09-06T15:53:00.002-04:00

I have been back in NIgeria 3 weeks today. There is a lot to say but I am tired and uninspired. Actually, I was inspired before logging into blogger but can not remember any of it. It has been an interesting ride so far.

Necessity:

Another little story I like. A couple fly-campers were running low on food in northern BC a week before the helicopter was scheduled to pick them up. Worry turned to desperation when a bear broke into their foodcache and stole most of the food.

What to do? They hunted down the bear and indirectly recovered their stolen food in the form of boiled bear meat. Not the tastiest, but it sure beats eating tree bark.

There are always opportunities cleverly disguised as obstacles. Hunt them down.

The Returnee Series: I am not complaining

2009-08-20T20:19:00.004-04:00

So I landed at Murtala MOhammed. Took 2 hours for one of my bags to come out of the plane - well I think that was the hold up. The plane seats 419, at 2 bags a person thats 838 bags, perhaps it makes sense. One bag did not make it.

This is the fun part. Now all the folks I flew in with were really well behaved. I didnt see any of the "Nigerians in Amsterdam are always rowdy" syaings. They were orderly. Then we got to Murtala Mohammed and next thing they are fighting over carts. Mehn, you could have knocked me over with a handful of pounded yam. I guess when you are in Naija, better behave like Naija folks - as in alagbari lo ga mugun (I really cant translate that)

Its been fun so far. Note to all those thinking of moving back to Nigeria - not that I am an expert - but when you visit and when you decide to live here are two different ball games. The sight for both is different. I am not regretting it, I am loving it but I do miss the non-ceasing electricity supply. And also having a million route to go to any one location avoiding traffic on the way.

I was at the Ayinke House Matternity Ward... O My God... I wont say more than that.

If you are a returnee and have any adivce, be sure to hit me up. And looking forward to NYSC camp. I hear its fun.

The days here are flying by here. And yet so stretched out. Enough of my not complaining, but really I am not complaining.

I am coming down.

2009-08-05T15:45:00.002-04:00

Last year I was in Nigeria and did a little write up on my visit. Now I read it and it sounds more like some poetry dish than an account of my visit. Though I suppoise I can say it contained some useful information on my expoerience. I wrote on there that God willing I will be back permanently some day. I only didnt think then it would be this year, or maybe I decided not to accept it. So early this year, I thought about it, more like finalized it in my mind and told all that needed to know, I am coming down to Nigeria. As soon as it escaped my mouth, I knew it was in motion and there was no turning back.

I will miss the United States. Though my friend said not to worry it will pass. I am not sure why anhyone wakes up and say they will move back home. Afterall everything you hear is aboiut how hellish it is, how everyone wants to leave the place and make a dash for the US. I always wondered really why the fascination with this country called the United States, and no I am not one of those people who walk through a door and shut it behind them not wanting anyone else to walk in. I cannot say I had much of a choice when I came here to stay.

In the light of what Bill Clinton did, sacrificing some time to go see a ruthless dictator to free his fellow citizens however wrong they may have been, once is encouraged. You know someone has your back no matter what. That your country where you labor is watching out for you and values you. It appears the president of NIgeria was aware of some local terrorists in his own backyard and instead of quickly breaking it uo and restoring order, waited for them to misbehave so he can kill them.

Back to my story. While some are leaving Nigeria to make it somewhere else that is not Africa, I am carrying my bags and returning. Call me overreaching, overacheiving, over whatever, maybe deluded... that is your problem. But the enriching of my nation, the changing adn turning it on to the right path is my goal. I cannot do it all alone, but perhaps those who have started and those who dream it will join and enable me as I do the same for them. Then someday, everyone will want to return.

It just amazes me, with all that is going on in Nigeria, the kidnapping of foreigners, the theives breaking into homes and all the other evils you hear of, the forigners are always retunring to the so called "hell-hole". Granted there is more to it. Just incase you are wondering, yes I have always wanted to return and had planned to do it in another 3 years while I reap the American Dream, but then other issues played along making it early. Will you join me...?

Wow

2009-06-30T18:10:00.002-04:00

I totally forgot I had a blog. It took a minute to even remember the address of this blog. Well well... I shall try to start posting again.

Money

2009-02-23T11:22:00.001-05:00

As written by my friend, the soon to be author of Comedoes

I seem to be tired of reading the old king james version of the bible. The words like Thou , Shalt , whou , seems not be exciting to me any longer. So i went to barnes and noble to spice up my readuing with a new bible. Bible buying has changed over the years , there are so many variants that one can get lost in the adventure of seeking for the right bible. I stumbled on this bible "MAX LUCADO , Devotional Bible" .
I flipped the bible open , very colorful and attractive , but there is still an excerpt from the introduction to the MONEY message that has my mind puzzling ... Here are the excerpts word for word

" MONEY
If money is the guage of the heat then this study revealed that money is on the heart of most americans. In exchange for the ten million dollars
25 percent would abandon their family
25 percent would abandon the church
23 percent would become prostitute for a week
16 percent would give up their american citizenship
16 percent would leave their spouse
13 percent would put their children up for adoption

My note: I could give up my American dream. I am sure with 10 mil I can start a better dream in Nigeria.

Fickle Minded

2009-01-22T20:55:00.000-05:00

Human beings are so fickle minded. In 2004, even a bear that had been hibernating since the middle ages would not have voted President Bush in again for a second term, buit not so the American voters. They voted him in with a major land slide. Granted they did not have much options, not with John Kerry flip-flopping as was stated by Bush who really was not saying much. Not to mention his previous 4 terms. But good or bad, he was voted in. And them that voted him in swore over their living mother's grave that he was a better choice.

As Bush moved on at the end of his presidency, he was booed by the same people who lifted him up. Who heralded him over his opponent. Humans are very fickle. They quickly forgot how they praised him and welcomed him for a second term. How much they got behind his back as he went off into war and brought down the regime of the "Mad Man of Iraq" as they called Saddam Hussein in those days.

If nothing at all I was so suire the blubberings of President Bush in his first run should have devoid him of a chance at the presidency but book smarts as never been an indication of success in life, so that was okay. But by his first term people should have seen the writing on the wall. That aside, when power is bestowed upon you, you have the right and obligation to uphold it. As President Bush said of himself, he did everything in his power and to the best of his ability and integrity to serve the nation. He did what he could, but humans really are fickle minded.

I was pleased at the honour Barack gave President Bush. While he disagrees with Bush, he honoured his last days. He saw him off, embrasing him to the end. An uncle of mine, Ebenezer Obey - look him up and no he is not my uncle- once said "Eni to fe wa la mo, bo ya eyan kan bi nu wa aw o mo." (Its he who loves us we know, if someone is annoyed with us we do not know)

I watched as Obama was being sworn in, and I prayed that he would do exceedingly well. Because human beings are so fickle.

its that time

2008-12-31T13:26:00.002-05:00

Its that time of the year again, where people look back and think on what has been done to look forward to what will be done. Most people count their losses not seeing the gains they have made, mostly becuase they either didnt, or lost it in the shadows of sorrowful events. And truth is a few things that went wrong for them somewhat - either genuinely or not - overshadows the joys.

But as for me, I had a blast. This Christmas - and sorry I didnt wish you a Merry one - was great. I had so much fun. It was ecstatic. To think I spent some time wishing I had gone to Nigeria, since thats where all the fun is but once it jumped off, ob boy was it a ride. Not that I did anything I wouldnt normally do, actually I went skiing. It was a party after the other with well meaning friends, great conversation and sumptous food. It was like been with my family only these ones belonged to another. True feelings came out, i got to know my faults who doesnt have one. But all in all it was great. I think I should now be called the enforcer - I was made a judge in a game of taboo. They needed someone to keep an eye on the score, and you know how we like to cheat. It was great.

So on the cusp of a New Year. In 5 hours Nigeria would have crossed over, China already did as did India. We on the East coast will get there before the West coast (in the US that is) Britain will be about an hour before Nigeria, as will Ghana I think. Funny though, if you look at it somewhat we all did enter it at the same time. We are all on the same planet arent we, but the spinning does add a spin. If you have been reading the news, you will find that the Earth is spinning a little slower than it should and the whole Earth will be a few seconds behind the New Year. Scientifically proven. Word.

As tis New Year comes, you will be making resolutions and promises. Don't. If you have to wait till a New Year to make a resolution do you really need it. Make specific goals, set dates and go for it. You will see.

Well I have no wonderful insights for you. I will be at church tonight, praying for my future. Will spend time thinking about my life. As you should do yours.

Wishing you a Happy fruitful and prosperous New Year. God speed ahead.

The Wall Street Gurus!

2008-10-17T17:05:00.001-04:00

If you have difficulty understanding the current world financial situation, the following should help...

Once upon a time in a village in India, a man announced to the villagers that he would buy monkeys for $10.

The villagers seeing there were many monkeys around, went out to the forest and started catching them. The man bought thousands at $10, but, as the supply started to diminish, the villagers stopped their efforts. The man further announced that he would now buy at $20. This renewed the efforts of the villagers and they started catching monkeys again.

Soon the supply diminished even further and people started going back to their farms. The offer rate increased to $25 and the supply of monkeys became so little that it was an effort to even see a monkey, let alone catch it!

The man now announced that he would buy monkeys at $50! However, since he had to go to the city on some business, his assistant would now act as buyer, on his behalf.

In the absence of the man, the assistant told the villagers: Look at all these monkeys in the big cage that the man has collected. I will sell them to you at $35 and when he returns from the city, you can sell them back to him for $50.

The villagers squeezed together their savings and bought all the monkeys.

Then they never saw the man or his assistant again, only monkeys everywhere! Welcome to WALL STREET!

Me...

2008-10-08T21:12:00.003-04:00

(If you see me in future, dont bring this up)

Help... I am afraid of commitment. I think I am okay with intimacy. I have formed amny of that over time. Not necessarily sexual, but the talk, the closeness, the affection (if that is what intimacy is) But commitment is a bone I have not learned to crack. I have had relationships but the commitment to it, the putting all you can into it as not exactly been achievable. I had often thought some girls just like playing games, or are not stable enough, not knowing what they want and true in some cases but in cases it was just me. Just I take that step, I fail by hesitation.

I chilled with a lady this weekend, and she mentioned to me "I am sure a lot of girl like you and want you but you dont bulge." She looks like she is ready to do what is necessary to get me, and I am a sucker for people who read me well. For its true, I know girls who like me but like them all I want I cant seem to make that move. Once they get closer, due to my subtle invitation and sweet mouth and this inclination to wriggle out of foot-in-mouth situations, I slither away. They are dazed, I am confused. Often times I have chased after the "elusive" girl, and I think I know why. I feel comfortable knowing there is no commitment there but really her staying away is a result of getting tired waiting. CAn I blame her?

Of course there has been the girl I like and will go after, something about those girls stand out from others and my instincts on them are usually right but I cant make it happen. Are they afraid of commitment?

If I am honest I will say I know what the issues are. Not that I can trace them to childhood or some traumatic events, but they might be simple.
I am afraid to let go. I am an addictive person. What I enjoy I give myself to. A challenge I pick up on is one I throw myself to. Take blogging, sometimes I dont know what to blog about but I cant quit blogging. I started it, have to foiinish it... I dont know what the finishing line is but I will continue. I have tried a few stick of cigarette, but I know not to try it continuously I will be hooked. My friends know it. If I pick it up I wont stop. I think the fear is that if I get into a relationship and it is not working I will not know to hold back. I feel this sense of responsibility to keep it going, some sort of self pity to not let somone down or disappoint them. I care too much.

Sometimes I wonder if I can make the right choice. But I have to be in one to know. In one of the bloigs I read, the author says "I’m at that age where I see the goodbyes in every hello. My biggest weakness when it comes to relationship is over analyzing everything and not enjoying them. " This is how I have been most of my life and I keep having this feeling that at this stage I cant just try something for trying. And I cant just go all out for everything either. Atleast thats how I think of it. It seems like everyone around me wants to get married which is not a bad thing, but does that means my commitment to that person starting out will end up in that. Someone said if you are afraid of been hated you are not ready to be loved. I dont mind been hated its what will happen to that person's dreams and hopes, their expectations not been fulfilled while I take up their time that holds me back; not that its my plan but it can happen and nothing I can do about it. Maybe thats where the hate comes in.

I must confess, I have met girls i have gone for, future be damned, but not every venture goes ur way.

I will go for what I want but the future is scary. You probably say this is someone who wont get far, or missing out of great things. Perhaps.

Sarah Palin

2008-10-03T16:33:00.002-04:00

I hate to be disrespectufl but this is as hilarious as it is true. Do you agree?

INTENTIONS

2008-09-27T20:53:00.002-04:00

If you have heard the expression that “actions speak louder thanwords” you will know the difference between intentions and reality.

No matter how much you say you mean something, if you actdifferently, you don’t really mean it.

No matter how much you say you want to change a habit, if you dothings that support the habit, you don’t really want to change.

No matter how much you say you want to do something, until youactually do it, you don’t want to. There are two ways to align your words and your deeds (That’scalled “integrity”)

1. Change your words.
2. Change your deeds.

Will your good intentions become reality?

For the longest time I have been addicted to drinking Pepsi. I was so addicted I would know if what I was drinking wasnt Pepsi aka Coke, diet pepsi, other type of Cola, except for when I was in Nigeria, all the Cola drink was just all sugar, hence the same taste. I digress... see what you did.

Well well well, I lost my train of thought. But always write down your intentions and make a plan towards it and you will be surprised. My intentions are to loose some 30lbs and be fit. Get in some muscles, I have been thinking it for some 5 months.

I hate...

2008-09-04T16:09:00.002-04:00

That I am too nice and keep looking for the best in people. WHy I have to be the only one subscribing to the "do unto others..." mantra I will never understand. But really is that what I am doing? Yes. Oh well, everyon one always turns around and one ups you in the most ugly way. And the one person you screw over turns out to be the one you shouldnt have... not that one should. But somehow s**t sucks and you move on.

To the next person that comes my way that I will inadvertantly screw over, I apologise to you. You did nothing to be deserving of this, but you see its either I get you first or one day you will (un)knowingly screw me over. This I cannot take a chance on the latter happening, because the pain I dont want you going through is the same pain you will reward me with. Now you understand. I could tell you upfront whats on my mind, and how I will want ourinteractions to go, or that you know the motivations behind my intentions, it might not match with yours and it might but somehow I get the feeling you wouldnt appreciate it due to how I will present it. Perhaps make your cards visible up front and we will both be fine. Its alright though, in this dog eat dog world, all is fair. I have seen the only ones crying are the victims. When they are victors they loose sight of it all.

Either way you look at it, it aint as serious as I have made it. Thats why I am kicking back, and I already know you will get hurt real bad. Not physically, emotionally may be; but I have been getting over it so will you.

How sweet it is to be loved by you.

2008-08-25T13:03:00.004-04:00

What do you do when you go to a friend's wedding? You dont tell your parents. Else, you will have to give an answer to the timeless question: when are you inviting your friends to yours? As if its about you wanting to invite yhour friends more than they wanting to invite theirs. But its always cool.

So again another friend bit the dust, he found his fair (read best, great, good, whatever) price. We all went again, we made the airline industry quite happy. Not with missed flight, cancelled flights, resecheduled and late scheduled flight. They are not complaining I am sure. But it was mad fun. It was a great time. Friends and family meeting up again after such a long time. I think next to airports as portrayed in the movie, Love Actually, weddings are the second greatest places where people meet joyously after a long while, not counting ota (Ota is a Yoruba word for enemy, but when used in conjunction with - or same sentence as - enemy it playfully denotes they are worse than the English translation. Its a Yoruba thing and okay if you dont get it) and enemies of course. They are eveywhere.

Anyway, it was joyous I say. Great time. Saw my friends baby, she has been married a year now. Her family was doing wonderful. Another friend that came, not part of the original clan of friends but close enough, found a love interest. Hopefully it blossoms, then I can go for another wedding soon. Tha last wedding I went to some girl asked if any girl "winked" at me and if I followed up. So I kept my eyes open for winks. Kai, walahi no better place than a wedding to meet fine and fun girls. No BS. I swear. Mo fi ka senu, mo na owo si orun (I touch my mouth and point to heaven - Another way of swearing, the highest kind it seems in Yoruba-dom. Again is a Yoruba thing).

The wedding was great. I think I said it a million times already. But I failed to be guilt into a wedding. Something about watching your friends joined together with someone you know beyond doubt they are a fit for just swells same feeling in you. But I remain that you have to find that one person for you. As we drove away to the airport, they held each other oblivious of me watching them in the rear view mirror and I saw that same familiar thing I witnessed long before they got engaged. I smiled to myself, knowing these ones, like the last one , will do just fine. No fear. My only regret, I did not have a camera to freeze forever the moment I had just witnessed in my rear view mirror.

Happy Tuesday

2008-08-19T11:29:00.004-04:00

There is a story that a teacher of mine used to
tell, it goes like this -

There was a little Creature Village with all of
these little Creatures in it, and it was a very
WINDY town.

Since the Creatures were so small, they would
surely fly away if they didn't hold on and GRASP
whatever they could, so they held on to poles and
fences, and they even tied little ropes on to each
other and all of their children so they wouldn't
fly away.

Then one day, a Rebellious Teenage Creature
started to Question Authority.

He asked, "WHY do we have to GRASP and hold on to
each other like this? It's no way to live! I'm
tired of being a control-freak and living in FEAR!
Why can't you just cut my ropes loose and let me
be?"

And the Creature Parents said, "If you don't
hold on tight, if we cut your rope loose, you
would just fly away! There is no way we could do
that - we love you too much."

Whatever.

The Rebellious Teenage Creature had enough of
holding on to everything in sight, and one day, he
cut the ropes and just LET GO.

At first, he flew up into the air and rolled
around all over the place... bumping into
everything... and finally he learned to swivel
upright and managed to learn how to control his
weight and glide gracefully in the air...

And he flew around for a while, and eventually he
saw what looked like ANOTHER Creature Village! So
he swooped down and grabbed onto a tree and pulled
himself down to meet its people.

By the time he reached the ground, most of the new
Creature Village People had gathered around him,
and started to worship him, kissing his feet and
offering up their possessions and their
daughters...

He said, "Why are you all worshiping me?!"

The Creature Mayor came forth and said, "But you
are The One, the Messiah, you have flown in from
the Heavens to Rescue us!"

He rolled his eyes and said, "I'm no Messiah! I
am just like all of you... the only difference is
I LET GO."

Addendum: I have found that we hold on to popular beliefs due to fear (Duh!). BUt perhaps - ~~I think only Nigerians mix words this way~~ - there is more to it. I think we are too familiar with the old that seeing sense in the new challenges our understanding, and reasoning. We get too comfortable and comfortable people dont get why anything needs to change or why the change is better than the present state. Think about this: You are sitting in front of the TV or watching something otherwise interesting. Once something needs to change your position, you find that you are extremely comfortable, and it took you a while to find that spot. Would you now want to give it up? The truth is its not finding that sweet spot that gets you to stay in the same position.

Comfort Zone: The best illustration of comfort zone is this: A (wo)man does their best to acheive a result that gets them close enough to their original goal. They stop to take a breathe thinking they will continue. Soon they find out they are slumping after resting too long. At some point in their decline they hustle some more and get to a point closest to where they last where and relax again thinking if they did it once they will do it again, but not right now. The decline to a point thatys higher than their last inclination before they start to hustle all over again. It gets to a point where they cant go any higher and will not accept going any lower ( a threshold) and there they hover. Their comfort zone. A level otherwise known as mediocrity. But the are doing well, nothing changes.

Look go out and do something. You will get hurt, you will get pushed down, you will be rejected, but it if you keep learning and adjustting your strategy for optimum performance, you will win.

That was a long one. ~~sorry~~

From that to this

2008-08-15T15:48:00.001-04:00

From That:
On Saturday, I had just had a swell time shooting paintball with some friends. We were discussing our new found respect for the soldiers that go to war. I had barely walked into the "war zone" when a paint ball exploded on me. And I thought if it was real In would be dead. A friend got a ball on his goggles right in front of his eyes (could have a been a disabled soldier). For a second I was really scared, somehow the lines between reality and fantasy had blurred out and it all looked the same. I was enjoying an activity I had always wanted to participate in but the real experience behind made it all too plausible. I had thoughts of Iraq, war zones of Somalia, Darfur, and even the Niger Delta. There is no heroism here, everyone for himself, God be the judge. As we got used to the whole fantasy turn reality, we started to strategize as soldiers would. We had suicide missions, we watched out for each other, at some point our code word for attack was shouting out "Rambo". It was delirious. We actually got used to it, crawling on the floor, covering each other, having outpost for look outs. It was fun once you got used to it. I wonder if at some point the soldiers found fun in the work they did. Isnt that the recipe for a good life, enjoying what you do?

To This:
THe fun I was over and I had gone to retrieve my phone when I got a text "Oh no, Bernie mac has died." I didnt mix it up. I knew what it meant and try as hard as I could not to believe it, it really was futile. A few days earlier he had beat the Pneumonia. How then did he die? What caused it? I rushed back to my friends, telling them what I had found out. Some guy heard me and I felt no reaction from him. Not that he should have cared, but I got a feeling he found out long before I did, while I was in my "war zone". He had accepted it and moved on. I dont know Bernie from Adam. If I had met him before he died he may not have paid me any mind. But there is something about the people we look up to, or that we hold in admiration. For me it was the banner fulfilling its purpose. It was his poise, his "this is what I am here to do and I will get it right" attitude. He cared not what you thought about him or how he goes about doing his thing. He knew he was doing it the best way he can and in a way you will never get to do it. It was his show. His life. I dont know him personally but I think he did it good. He once told a young man, " I dont want you to imitate me, just be you. Do your own thing." Bernie did his own thing, he was him. He was funny too. Not many people make good fun of their situation the way he did. You believed him, you felt for him. he made light of situations, and nothing seemed to bother him because he knew tomorrow would come and it will be a different ball game.

Well so long Bernie. In the words of Don Cheadle "Heaven just got funnier".

Happy Tuesday

2008-08-12T20:42:00.003-04:00

LIFE

Traffic stops. It starts. It slows down. Then you find a good stretchwhere you can activate the cruise control. Along the way, there areturns. Many of them are planned in advance, Some are last minutedecisions (Oops…forgot to pick up bread). Some are total surprises,like the detour or the crash up ahead. Life is a trip. There are times it speeds up, times it slows down,times it seems to be on a roller coaster and times when it just movesforward at a relaxed and steady pace. And there are plenty of curvesand changes of directions. There are times when we suddenly change ourplans and when those plans are suddenly changed for us. That’s OK, life is dynamic. Enjoy the ride.

Addendum: None for today. My brain is lazy.

Mistakes

2008-08-05T11:12:00.002-04:00

I am starting a new series... does this make me conceited?
This series is called Happy Tuesdays. I get emails from a guy called The Happy Guy. Very good stuff.

Enjoying the first one...

One should never stop learning, for when we stop learning, we stopgrowing. And when we stop growing, we remain the same, survivingwithout a purpose. But what is the key to learning? There are more than one, of course.Curiosity is one way. Curiosity drives us to look at thingsdifferently, to stick our nose where we have never stuck it before, totry things we don’t really know how to do, to make mistakes. Andthere is no teacher better than mistakes. Without mistakes, there isvery little learning. So go out and make some mistakes. It’s the best way to make sureyou are doing more than just surviving.

Addendum: Go out there and do something thats has always scared you, something you think you can be good at but havent tried, something entrepreneurial, something life changing, something earth shattering. If you fail and your failure laughs in your face, just keep walking. Pretend its not there, pretend its only your imagination.
Thoas Edison said of the tungsten filament when he created the lightbulb, " I have only found 10,000 ways that will not work." Truth is today, we care not about his 10,000 ways but his 1 way that worked. Bruce Lee, the famous martial aritst said "I am not afraid of the man who has practiced 10000 kicks but him who has practised 1 kick 10000 times." Meaning in your mistakes, you learn to be perfect.

Yay, he died...

2008-08-01T13:46:00.004-04:00

It is really sad if at the rumour of your death people are rejoicing or worst still, hiding their giddiness pending a confirmation.

Some guy (dude from here on) lost his brother and harldy pulled sympathies from those that should matter (we all do but bosses are different). Not that they do not want to, some dont know if to believe him or they could have just cared less either because "its really a busy season and consequently they have no time to call or stop by" or they just dont care due to other reasons of a**holeness from him (so i have heard).

He once took time off because his girlfriend was sad that some footballer was fatallly shot. Imagine that, no relationship between her and the footballer. So you can see how tired people are. Then even with his loss, he bites (figuratively) but when he talks on the phone to people about it he is sober.

So someone sent out an email saying the dude died and his funeral is coming up as opposed to his brother died and the funeral is up coming. Sign acrad donate some money and the likes. He sent out 3 emails to have it corrected but somehow each successive email only made it worse.

Someone from across the ocean - literally - called to verify not out of compassion, from what I gathered, or with evil - whatever you define it to be - intention. It was more of "wow, it happened. ok, cool." It seemed like he would have been about as happy as if the dude at quit.

I dont know. It has been a laughing issue all day about his death. And I, I feel for him.

Should people be happy at the thought of your death? Even the devil sometimes gets some compassionate speech. May be if he was dead it would not matter, but he will be back and have to deal with the indifferent people. Ouch.

Does this make sense at all...

2008-07-24T12:43:00.002-04:00

Friend:
yeah...im actually suprised at how it is coming to me...maybe i have a gift after allMe:
maybe u do
Me:
sometimes u got to start then it makes its own way
Friend:
yeah
Me:
even with gifts. u have to give it for it to express itself

Consider This...

2008-07-23T22:09:00.001-04:00

Intimacy does not thrive where someone is not free to choose separateness without guilt.

Dr. Henry Cloud

How do I?

2008-07-23T21:43:00.002-04:00

Just looking for more ways here:

If you are bored, you will be boring
What do you do - by yourself and with others - not to get bored?

You should love yourself, then others will love you
In what ways do you love yourself?

Just as we need food everyday, we continue to need motivation
How do you motivate yourself daily?

Respect youself.
How do you respect yourself?

Stop waiting

2008-07-23T21:03:00.002-04:00

Eni ti on duro de ise ju akan, a pe le ti omi
He who waits for the crab to blink, will stay long by the water side.

I got into talking with a friend, and we dicussed how I always wanted to do more, as I have felt like I could do more and should be more. Lets just say in my early twenty's I talked a lot of game and ish about doing this and doing that, and retiring by 30 (what a dream). I am not retired and dont see retirement any time soon. Lets just say, again, with proper guidance and mentoring, I might be retired or almost there, or felt like I had done a lot and look for more. But I digress.

He initaited the conversation by mentioning someone's house that was in the neighborhood we were hanging out. As we walked, he told me somethings the guy had done and how much money he had made. MOney aside, soiunded like things I wanted to do; quite related stuff. While we talked, I told him of they ideas i had, and how a few things were in the way. Had they not, I would have been larger than life. Then he mentioned alternatives. If you cant register a company here cant you register somewhere else. Light bulb moment. He mentioned other ideas way around my obstacles. But most of all what he asked was his: when things settled down for you and all this obstacles clear out, are you going to start from the beginning or continue from where you would be if you start right now?

So I started to think. All the time I heard there is no way here or the road terminated there, if I had trudged on who knows what I would have accomplished? Who knows what door I may have opned for myself or what door I would notice has always happened. One of the things I have observed is how we compartmentalize in everyday life. You see a litle child been attacked you step in, but when you are been attacked you are quite and let yourself be rained on. You walk away from one situation and stay in the other just as well. I think I am digressing.

Well I dont know what you have set aside for when things change for you. Fact is in life I think and I do believe some things will have to wait. All others, you have to get down on quick. Obstacles are like people saying no to you, and in the words of Someone "Never let anyone tell you no if they are not in position to tell you yes". So go out start doing something, a little at a time towards the one big thing that needs to happen for you.

Waiting for a new job, start buying your outfits. You got to wear a suit, shit and tie, a skirt, a blouse and such. If they ask you to start tomorrow, you either go shopping tonite or go naked.
You like the girl, ask her out, talk to her, hint her, else she will think she is just your friend.
Your boyfriend getting tired of the relationship, well dump him quick or spice it up (okay that sounded corny.

I am getting carried away. Let me know if you feel this and if there is something you need to start working on. I have 2 books on my mind, and some other business projects. I think I got some work to do. Peace. Good night.

He is married.

2008-07-08T17:34:00.002-04:00

So on Saturday, the day after America celebrated yet another year, we went and got my friend married. It was a beautiful celebration. Never mind the journey some people had to take, it was great. They had fun, mad fun. I am sure many of those traveling, were using just a little bit of energy on their journey down. They saved the rest for Saturday, which perhaps added more stress to their already tired body. Afterall, bodi no be firewood.

I am not sure anyone was more happier than the bride, except for say my friend the groom. He kept saying I cant wait for the day to be done, then it became I cant wait to dance at the reception. Then it was I cant wait to be married. Soon he gave in. Lets do this, he said. I was so proud and happy, you would have thought I was his father if you could read my mind. I stood by him as, yes you guessed it, best man knowing I was making the right choice supporting him - not that it would have changed anything otherwise - but then that would be getting to technical.

On Saturday, we partied up. One of us has taken the plunge upwards into the best years of his life. We danced; In all the emotions, happiness, and giddiness he didnt loose himself. He even danced to Billy Jean in a way only Michael Jackson himself could have. He did at the previous night party and also at the wedding to cap off a performance by friends who did a fashion show.

Marriage is like a dance, not only do you need the right partner, you have to be the right partner. And thats what I saw when I watched my friend say "I do" to his bride. I saw first hand how partners learn from and rub off each other. She learned a lot and has changed in ways I would have thought people resisted. So did he. Now I know, the woman or man for you and I would not mind our little shananigans but accept them and make a rainbow out of them. Funny, a few weeks ago, I thought to myself anyone who cannot appreciate and work with the good effort I put into a relationshiop, just might not be mine. If only they would walk away (am I digressing?)

I have always observed marriages favorably, unlike some who think that in marriage you tie yourself down, or settle for someone, or perhaps withold yourself from sex with numerous women - or men - (I am not sure that is what life is made off). Looking at my friend, it made marriage a worthwhile endeavor. To have a friend, someone to watch your back, and someone to care for and about. Someone to feel free around. You cant find such people in the market, you make them out of their raw materials as they make you out of yours.

Well well, I was feeling maybe I should have someone to call my own then, and some girls were looking mighty delicious (good and caring), but I quickly snapped out of it. and decided I might just be single a little while longer looking for some good raw materials to carve out my woman from. I think that is a much better solution. Am I saying it wont be one of the many ladies at the wedding, nah I never said that.

My good friend, congratulations from the buttom of my heart. Friends like you are either rare or readily available, I am just fortunate you are my friend. Someday, I will be sure to join your kind (in marriage that is) until then keep it popping. I am sure you will soon show me what I am missing out of. But nah, I wont be pressured.

The pastors donkey

2008-07-08T16:31:00.001-04:00

The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won.
The pastor was so
pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the
race again, and it won
again. The local paper read: 'PASTOR'S ASS OUT
FRONT.'

The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity
that he ordered the
pastor not to enter the donkey in another race. The
next day, the local paper headline read: 'BISHOP
SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ASS.'

This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the
pastor to get
rid of the donkey. The pastor decided to give it to
a nun in a nearby
convent.
The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the
following headline the
Next day: 'NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN.'

The bishop fainted. He informed the nun that she
would have to get rid
of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer for $10.
The next day the Paper
read: 'NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10.'

This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the
nun to buy back the
donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run
wild.
The next day the headlines read: 'NUN ANNOUNCES HER
ASS IS WILD AND
FREE.'

The bishop was buried the next day....

---------------------------------------------------------
Morale of the story is .... being concerned about
public opinion can
bring you much grief and misery ... and even shorten
your life.
So be yourself and enjoy life ..... you'll be a lot
happier and live longer!

Life Progressions

2008-06-28T23:25:00.003-04:00

It is currently 11:25 pm. This time next week my friend of 11 years will be married. He will be snatched out of this life of singleness into coupleness. In my inner circle of friends, though we are scattered every which way, there are four of us guys. We held close enough, we have other friends that just dont match up to our type of freindship. Maybe they do, but we are just different if you know what I mean. Perhaps you have long friends as such, maybe you know some people since forever but they just dont match with this other set you have not known for so long. But either way, I do. One is married, 2 are engaged and I, I am just me. Actually, 2 are married but the one was traditional. The formal (why do we call everything white formal) is coming up.

When my friend gets married next week, and the third in another 2 months, i will be left all singular. No, I am not sad, but its almost lonely, yet I am not alone. I am very happy for my friend getting married, it couldnt have happened to a more worthy person. Not that the journey there was easy for him, he had his struggle for you know there were some hurdles to jump over. I am excited for my friend, he kept his composture, he kept his head up, and that has made it easy for all to rejoice with him. Through this life, I learnt that all things do come around at some point in time, all things do work out. As they say, "what would be would be." In this case, that has proved through.

I will be his bestman. He is much taller, hence I will not be stealing the show. I think they would be wondering who the short guy tailing him is.

The most inetersting part, we talk on how it used to be. The girls dated that one wished would have worked out but didnt, the girls almost dated, if there was ever such a thing, and no we did not talk about the girls that will never be dated, as that is not the point of life. We reminisced on school life, the struggle, the hardship, the triumphs. Who would have thought that someday we will be here counting our blessings, and looking forward to start a whole new life. Not just with one self, but to care for another, to love them, to cherish them. Someone that makes you happy, that nbreathes new life into you. I am not sure there is anything better than to be vulnerable around someone else, to trust them with you emotions. Of course its not always sweet, thats the reality we put in mind.

Whats the point of this post, I dont know really. I am happy for my friend, I am proud to stand by him to cheer him on. because when I was down, he lent me a hand. When life was bleak, he shared is joy. As men, we cant always cry, but everyman must let it out somehow. He is my let it out buddy. Someone you can just go hang with, an talk about everything. Someone who laughs at you, makes fun of your silly mistakes, who tells you he thought the girl you dated was crazy but you seemed to handle it well. He laughs at my choices, asking why I like so much drama (and strangely I am attracted to it - drama that is). Sometimes you just need a friend to tell you the stupid thing was not really your fault, who tells you even though you knew the girl was wrong for you its still her fault it all went south. Dont you just love that.

My good friend, as you go ahead to be joined to the woman of your dreams, the woman who makes it all worth it, the one who gave you a reason to stay, I bid you well. I pray that the joy of finding a love, a friend, someone to care for, to cherish, will always be yours. Many have taken this step more than once, yours will be permanent. I will miss our time of talk, as I know now you have one better to talk to.

My friend, enjoy your marriage, enjoy hyourself, enjoy your wife. Enjoy life.

Procrastination

2008-06-16T13:48:00.001-04:00

1. I actually want to write some nice juicy story here, but alas I am not such a story teller.

Procrastination: put off doing something, especially out of habitual carelessness or laziness.

Procrastination is a lazy mans' way of getting nothing done. Something always comes up that prevents you from doing that which must be done immediately. At the point of procrastination, it is not seen as needlessly postponing to later what can be done now, but more of defering that which much be done to a later time, when you will get a chance to do it well, or have more time to pay attention to it. The truth is there is no better time than now except its the case where the tools you need are not readily available.

If everyone procrastinates like me, one major excuse will be "I work better under pressure, or when I have multiple things to do I can stay focused". Is that true? I beg to differ. When you have too much to do you wound up not doing it well. Often times for me, a self-diagnosed chronic procrastinator, there is something I have attached to starting a job or project or task that I have not reconcilled with. I see that the task at hand will be ardous, and take much effort. The task I am about to embark on will require more of me than I am willing to give, or not sure I can afford for that matter. I often see that I can do something perfectly well, and fear settles in. If you will do a job you might as well get it done right. Put in all that you can to it. That is what I run from. The choice to put in my best, to make something so simple beautiful.

Procrastination is an habitat of escape that I now enjoy even though I know it would blow up my stress level when the time to show results. Imagine juggling 2 - 3 tasks that require the highest form of concentration and time. Tasks that need uninteruptible time to be done. Imagine a boss glaring down at you asking for the assignments that had been given more than enought time for completion. ITs not fun and contradicts the idea that one can work better under pressure. When the pressure mounts so does the stress, and then the self-esteem tumbles with every disappointment that follows. Knowing you can do better but not been able to actualize it.

The truth is everytime you procrastinate, everytime you psotpone needlessly, you will in future face other issues that demand as much of you as the original task at hand. You were once a student, how many times did you defer your assignments till tomorrow then finf out that you have an exam and a project due the day the initial assignment is required. How is that for pressure? Have you ever wondered why you couldnt do all 3 together and come out excellently? Maybe you did, I bet that was the exception and only time it happened?

Have you ever gotten to work late because you had to wash your clothes, dry them and ireon them before going to work? Or cut your hair after aking up late before exercising and then getting to work late, in the process forgettting your suit case? Or the girl you could be dating telling you she is no longer interested because you procrastinated teeling her your feeling now you have to compete with 10 other guys (okay this example does not count).

Whatever it is you have to do, start. Do not be afraid of success, nor the effoprt required to have it done. Truth is, as I found out, and can now tell you will never stop procrastinating. Never. True they say "Never say never", but I can say they have not thought about procrastination. The idea is not to stop it but manage it. Know what is important to you, know what will make an impact to you and through you. What will affect the qquality of your life, such as some friends are good for you and some are not. Do you invest in the latter?

I have procrastinated on writing about procrastination. How ironic is that? I cant say I liek this verson better than the one I originally thought to write? And I cant say this is not better either, for this was not my original method to go about it. Whatever.

1. Know what is important to you
2. Identify how important it is
3. Know the time frame of it
4. Get to know your strength and your weaknesses, your fears and worry
5. Even if you fail, so what
6. Do not be afraid of success and the work required for it. The truth is when you learn to be successful you break a mould you have created around yourself, you learn something about you. It is a good aphrodisiac to having a mind set on greater things
7. Dont put a pressure of perfectness on yourself. Just go with it. You will learn in time.

I am learning to wite pardon my lack of structure. On the other hand I could have procrastinated again to get a good structure then this posting wouldnt have been done. And by the way, I wrote this in my down time while hanging with a friend. Your least priority stuff can be done in your down time, and your most priority can move along in your down time. Get it?

Attaining Greatness

2008-06-02T12:04:00.004-04:00

The thing about doing your best and reaching for greatness is, you can never go wrong and you will always achieve great results regardless of the outcome. While at it you must be honorable in your efforts. There is nothing sadder than when finished to be tainted but a misgiving of the past. Although some misgivings do go away, others stay.

That said, when a person reaches for the highest pinnacle, when their thought patterns changes, they begin to rise high. That is why a person’s action speaks more for them than their very words. When words and action are in agreement, we value what is said that much more. We are sucked into them, does "charming" sound familiar.

When you reach for greatness, the truth is many of us never get to the target. Something always happens along the way to derail us. For as much as we are elevated by our positive thoughts, the law of Physics applies too. Every action has an equal but opposite reaction. The naysayers will have a say in it, the enemies will butt in their opinions because God forbid that you do more than they would like you to do, and then the ‘ota’ (enemies in Yoruba, there is something to this I cannot justly explain in English) will go all out to stand in your way like a huge boulder.

Either way it is the way of the Victorious to rise above every obstacle, and an un-mountable obstacle must be destroyed making way for the discouraged and those who are just starting out. The Victorious also knows when to chart a new course of action, and when to pursue after the intangible thereby leaving the present pursuit for something equally greater and more feasible (or an accumulation of lesser that amounts to greater achievement), perhaps in that you find the strength and a new meaning for the initial goal at hand.

Whatever the case maybe, the world waits those who search new paths to bring about new value to life. They await those who risk it all for a greater glory they are yet to see, a glory that may not exist but worth the struggle just for perceiving it. In the end (did I use this phrase already), when the path to your glory is blocked, another opens up just astride of it – “have u read about penicillin?” Because, if Greatness is a God, it is delighted in your pursuit, it will make itself available in every corner it hides itself.

Tell me to move on

2008-05-29T14:38:00.000-04:00

A not too long time ago I liked her, she liked me back. Or maybe just fancied me. We wined and dined, i spoke she laughed. She cooed, made suggestions, I chilled, must warm it up. Then she was distant, not exactly available, for her lost love had ever so slightly returned.

She left, I was alone. No more talk from me, no more soul raising giddys laugh from her. Now she beckons, I do answer. I like her, she is interested but not so available it seems. For every time I call her out into the sun she seeks to hide in the shadows. Many needs she fulfils but mine she chose to not care. Her need for giddy laughs I fulfil with words eloquently spoken. She is still distant, the lost love gone again. And yet I remain, in the sun waiting for her to step out.

Yet I know I wait in vain, for this girl only her interest is displayed, her availabitly never to be found.
Now I pray you must tell me that which I know I must do. Whisper to me, tell me "to move on". For I stay even a little longer, a heavy heart been the price I must pay for my foolish ways.

This is not an analysis.

2008-05-28T10:42:00.007-04:00

The Road Less Travelled can be read at the buttom of this analysis.

I first read this poem back in 1997. Up till then I never heard words so smooth that speaks to a future one chooses for himself based on independent and carefully considered choices. Obviously, the individual gets to a point in life where the way forward has two paths to it: the familiar (the road that went under the growth) and not so familiar (the one that was grassy and needed wear).

Reading them back in the day, I wondered what my story will be, but given the different obstacles, impeditmants and other illusions of life, I soon forgot that which I read and thought, mostly gievn myself to fear of the uncertain and the consequences of choices made (both good and bad). Little did I know then I was threading the paths well beaten by many, the fear of failure being one of them, I think the fear of success came in to focus as well. Yes, the fear of success: how do I top what I just did, and how do I move on from there.

As true to the poem, as road leads onto road, I cannot go back to the beginning to start all over again, which is what I believe the last paragraph points to. One most be certain of the important decisions,mostly because they are personal decisions arising from the freedom to choose. I believe every decisions you make take you on a different path that continues to guide you on the grand plan or takes you off it. The foundation you built cannot be replaced, can be reinforced but takes more energy.

As you bid forward in life, I wish you continuous progress, that your mind will be clear to the choices you make, and the import of your freedom to choose will not be lost to the illusions of your youth. While an opportunity may be lost, you will in the wake of it find a path that puts you back on the right track and your star will be bright to lead you in your darkest hour and a gentle wind to push you when you are down on yourself. I wish you this, for at this time, this is exactly what I would want you to wish me.

The Road Not Taken

2008-05-28T10:40:00.001-04:00

(Read analysis below)

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,

And having perhaps the better claim,

Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for that the passing there

Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way,

I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

- Robert Frost

Breaking News...

2008-05-16T16:02:00.002-04:00

CNN reports that gas stations will start showing PORN movies on the
screens of the pumps so that you can see someone else get screwed at
the same time you do.: !!

Practical jokes...

2008-05-02T11:27:00.001-04:00

are not funny. Or are they when they happen to someone else. This is safe to view. Got it from another blog, enjoy.

Random Ish

2008-05-01T10:25:00.003-04:00

Someone from Nigeria will always be known as a Nigerian, as an American is from America. A Lagosian is from Lagos and as a Sicilian is from Sicili. There is a city in Greece named Lesbo and its indigens are known as Lesbians. Do you see the confusion here. How would you tell between a Lesbain and a Lesbian? Or a Lesbian and a lesbian? Is it clearer now? It didnt seem much of a problem until someone rose up and created a group called The Homosexual and Lesbian Communuity of Greece. What a nice play on words. Now the whole city is in disarray as a mayor fights against the inclusion of the word Lesbian in the group. Now lets have some fun.

So I was reading the funnies (comedy page) of the newspaper today. I came across this small snapshot of a bar: two guys on one end of the table, and alady on the other. One of the guys said to the other, "Go talk to her, whats the worst thing that can happen." Then I looked at the lady (in the cartoon) but didnt get it. And I have to say, the image of this cartoon showed real body language, the other dude who was been encourgaed really had something too loose. One more look at the cartoon revealed something so slight. The lady had a chain-saw right alongside her drink in front of her. Gives a whole new meaning to rejection dont it.

Nigeria, My Nigeria

2008-04-11T13:21:00.002-04:00

How great it was to keep your company this two short weeks. It seemed to go on forever then in a Lagos minute it all ended. Now I must go, back to a country far away, So foreign, yet familiar. To my new home I go. In these last two weeks, the land of my fathers has kept me safe. Many evil reported none has come even close. The same land that claimed many, that sooted its thirst with the blood of some, found it worthy to spare mine. I am eternally greatful to the God almighty.

Many friends I saw, the laughter the joy, the reminiscene and looking to the future. The beauty, if it ever is possible, that got multiplied by time. The little minds that have grown, the body that once frail, now made mighty as the mighty turn frail. Life as they say must go on.

The problems seem amplified to the untrained eye, but to the inquisitive mind, a mine of opportunities. The keepers of order being disorderly, the protector of the weak terrozing their subjects. Everyone for himself, God be the referee. The helpless damsels selling all they have, the price goes to the highest bidder, or is it the lower standards. What would be turned down, openly accepted.

The dark nights, even the moon refuses to brighten, the heat the earth gives off. Many sleepless nights due to the wet bed. Not from the wetting of the body, but the cooling of it. Many gallons of water vomitted through the pores of flesh, many more to be ingested in replacement. If the night was any longer, so will the madness be permanent, but this land takes care of its own. We are the happiest on earth because we dont need money to be content or because we have accepted the status quo?

Here I am departing the land of my father going to where a friend termed as "home." We glanced at each other and laughed. How ironic, if that is the word. Back there across the ocean we long for home. At home, we see the strange land as home. If home is where the heart is, I suppose we have betrayed our motherland as we switch allegiance to whatever it is we long for. In this case, that supposed land of honey is where my heart is. That is where home is.

Till I return again, perhaps for good if the Almighty wills it - The truth is I hope he does - O di igba kan na. Ohun ti o yipari kiitan, ipade wa bi oyin (What has no end is not finished, our reuinion as sweet honey).

Oju a tun ra ri o (We shall see each other again)

Paradigm Shift

2008-03-28T17:45:00.001-04:00

The one thing I have continuously heard in Lagos is “That is how we do it in Lagos.” And I complain a lot it seems; for me to hear it continuously that is. Well everything here is more bizarre than I had thought. Don’t get me wrong, things have changed. In the estate I live in, there are more houses, in fact to many. I think the estate had less than 20 houses when I last was here, over a decade ago. Not so much that I was not expecting it, but reality and imagination often time disagree.

Everything can be better I think, but when instead of 10 years ago you could not have a cell phone and now you do, life must be good. After all the Internet was a folklore back then, but now you either have it at home or for a few bucks you can utilize it are a kiosk, then things are good. If in deed “that is how they do it here” then I guess it is much better. But it is not how they do it; it is how they have been doing it. Hence same result but who would see it that way.

This is how we do it… we get the same result and we don’t know the difference. At first, I blamed the government for everything wrong in this country. They should be, but now I see it more as a people problem. Not the people, the mere citizens of this country, but people. The people who the same includes everyone that breathes air in this country: the citizens and government. I used to wonder if the government officials who have been abroad closed their eyes while on their trips, but now I have to ask the same of the mere people who have been overseas. Who have seen how civilized people handle their affirs. They return, curse the government and return to their usual part in the struggle against their country. No doubt the government should facilitate them, but then shouldn’t they be the change they seek.

This is how we do it… and I am not been naïve in my thoughts. If you act “too civilized” your fellow civilized people will take you for a fool and do you likewise. But in some areas you can act with some, dare I say it, sense. Speaking of sense, why do the police drive around in their pick-up-trucks-turned-house-type vehicles with assault rifles and don’t have enough sense to park their cars and redirect traffic when the run into hold-ups. They even drive past cars going the wrong way, and pretend the okada’s (commercial motorcycles) don’t exist, and hence not breaking the law.

This is how we do it… Why do you have small houses on the Third Mainland Bridge? They are supposed to be emergency shelters for broke down vehicles, yet when vehicles break down no one comes to their aid. And the police just sit there doing nothing. So we will have mail delivered to the touts “living” on the bridge. Did someone think when they came up with that? As it occurred to someone that a couple more bridges for people going in a different direction will greatly reduce traffic. You have someone going North first heading south then do a u-turn to go where they need to be; birds of different directions are flocking together I tell you. I suppose if that is how you do it, it works for you. But like I said that is how we have been doing it.

This is how we do it… When you apply solutions of yester years to solutions of this decade, obviously you won’t get much. But no one realizes that. If it worked then, should it work now? We need to change the way we way we approach our problems, the way we think. Everyone has to be responsible to him- or herself and extend that responsibility to their neighbour. The solutions are not far fetched; they are quite simple if you ask me. But I understand I preach to myself, because here, “This is how we do it.”

PS: Don’t get me started on the electricity issues.

The patient dog

2008-03-03T13:42:00.001-05:00

gets nothing. If it is lucky, some over chewed bones.

Update on my robbery story.

2008-02-12T17:39:00.000-05:00

Well The security at my building sent me an email to call some detective who happens to be a cool dude and will help if I "co-operate" well with him. I didnt read much into the co-operate and I am not going to. But its all cool. I called him several times and no dice. Man no pick up and did not return my call either. so I emailed them to let them no. It ended there. I havent heard anything and I hope I never do again. I will just let it rest. The deal is that we (my company) is a non-profit organization or so they say. And it is a high profile place and they report situations to police for investigation.

Speaking of non profit, I live in a city were people see themselves as high importance. If you were a suit, omo, you will get repect like no tomorrow. People will smile at you, when they otherwise have not in previous times, they will make way for you even if they want to knock you out instead. Things happen nice. Even the ladies think you different. Any time I need an ego boost, see me wearing my black suit. Black suit show power if you did not know. Not ego boost from the ladies, but men too. Reminds me of the cartoon where bugs buynny was saying excuse me, pardon me as he interrupted normal people from watching their movies. Only I dont have to say nada. They just move. Tell me thats not good.

It brings me to something else though. Why are people infatuated with what you do. After the "Hello, how are you?" the next question is "What do you do?" In that tone of your answer will determine whether I (they in this case) continue to talk to you. So condescending (is that the right word?) Your worth is now tied to if you are someone they should be fearful (read respect) off or someone theyc an pass up on. Hmm did they think that perhaps when you compare yourself to them and find them not worthy you will walk away as well?

Sometimes, you might not do much, just mention where you work. Reminds me of sometime, met this lady at one of this corner restaurants with a friend. Her friend was there too. She went off on how she is this looking for employment in that and on and on. I am thinking "okay I just wanted to know your name." Not even thinking about it (or did I?) I threw down some high powered company, and she started looking on the floor. Haha, so I am thinking "what happened to your I am girl-power stand?" As you can see I think a lot, but thats a topic for another.

(Let me point out here that 2 weeks has passed between the last sentence and the next one) My arguements to this question though is I think people more of want to know what you do as opposed to what makes you money. Your passion, your ideas, your thinking and possibly how do you pass time. This has been substituted with what do you do when you are not working. What are your hobbies, how do you pass your time what do you do for fun. But again it has been said, when you do what you love you never have to work again. Ha.

A friend was at a store when some lady approached her and asked "what do you do?" He said I work at a non-profit. Some guy stops by and she asked the same question and he mentions some off the cuff place and what not. Well she turns around she says to my friend, "atleast you have a better type of job." Well you will say what is the point? Exactly.

By the way, my friends now tell me to stop pick-pocketing and some offer to give me some more money as I am heading out. Funny.

Pick pocket drama

2008-01-02T13:50:00.000-05:00

Egbami O (Save My Soul).

So the only thing I did wrong today was look at a woman and katakata (Drama) bust. Left my work building and got lunch across the street. NOt necesarily a randy guy (who am i lying to) I saw some ladies and I took the liberty of a second look. Bang... bumped into the white dude. I apologised and if he had been paying attention (I think he was) he would have noticed I was looking at the ladies. Okay so we both went up the excaltor, and then he turns around and I got the sense he was sizing me up. Too late.

Next thing I heard is "You took my wallet. You bumped into me and took my wallet." This guy could have been Rambo in Blood 2 or Arnold in COmmando and he still couldnt have intimidated me after he said that. Ewooo, E gbele gbele, Mo daran, Ni bo, for were, o ri ya mi o (chants of someone in confused trouble and about to lay a smack on you, in my culture anyway). I thought it was some joke but homeboy was serious. A good example of someone who watched to many Dan Rather reports on Nigeria and 419 boys.

So we got to shouting, well I did in the I cant believe this way. You should see by standers ready to watch drama. You should understand why I shouted, not out of guilt but memories of when I was a yung'n (young one for those who dont watch the wire or understand hood speak). You see when I was young, whenever you hear theif pray its not in your direction the accuser is shouting. You will have old tires burning around your neck before Superman's super-hearing ear can come to your rescue. The mob will beat the theif out of your generation before they finally kill you, just pray you die before the beating itself starts. It was horrible on the streets of las-gidi (That is Lagos in Nigeria).

Well thank God this wasnt Lagos, on the second day od the year no less. Well cut the long story short, we shouted then a friend walks by and told me to just show the guy my pocket. I saw reason in this and I did, the idiot just walked away and I wanted to pago mo lori (break a bottle on his head) But then this is not Lagos. You know he came back to my work place with me requesting my ID number. Okay, I will catch a deep breath hear, bcos God knows I want to whoop his behind. I explain myself to the security and my friend said his bit, and then this white dude said "You took my wallet and passed it to someone, one of your friends" didnt I say this guy watched too many Dan Rather reports on Nigeria.

Well I thank God sha. I am more calm now. It is well.

It is the year of our Lord...

2008-01-01T23:03:00.000-05:00

Two Thousand and Eight! Welcome... You will find it is a time of new beginnings. It does not matter what has been and what is. As you proceed into this year, everything up until now does not matter. It is what you make of it that counts.
If once you were lazy, this is the time to get busy.
If once you were confused, time to seek clarity.
If once you were lost, time to find yourself.
You said once 2008 begins things will be different, now make it so.

In the year of our Lord Two Thousand and Eight, I resolve to find new purpose, create a new meaning for my existence. I resolve to put me first. For to change others, I myself must evolve. To pay more attention to me, to bring out the best in others is to first bring out the best in me. To be diligent in all that I do. But for dilligenece to pave way for me, I must have a goal in mind. To build a goal I must bhave a vision. A renewed one at that.

2007 was good. But 2008, will be that much better. How would I know? At the end, I will look back and tell you exactly if those things I set forth were done. We will have to wait and see. Do you want to set the goals for yourself. What story do you want to tell when this year is over? Would this be a year you cant wait to get over with, or one that you wish would stay that much longer?

I am doing a few new things this year. Get into some new interests, and revive old ones that are pertinent to my future. NO more waiting. I shall start to work on it (it been whatever) if it is fitting to be done. I know in this year I want to be more aware of myself, I want to choose rather than be chosen or drifting about looking for a mark when I can walk directly to it. I will set the boundaries, make them clear as day. In this year, I will improve relationships, making the weak ones stronger starting with my family. I will not let anyone frustrate me, I will choose my worries and stay far from those who are of a vexing spirit. I will listen more, talk even much more. I will sharemy passion to all who will hear it, afterall I will listen to theirs. I will not deprive them of mine.

My attitude towards life will be that of possibilities. I see me attaining heights. No more been paralized by fear, when taking an action will set me free sooner and the consequences not as dire. I will rise above my weaknesses, aiming to be better than myself each day, and will walk away from situations that does me no good. I will realize events that are time wasters and spend every minute they will claim doing that which promotes my health, effectiveness and productivity. I will define my purpose for each day, week and month.

For fun projects, I will take my time. Enjoy the process as I go along. I will not wait till I am done to savor the fruits of my labor. I will depart from instant gratification but take the long and hard road not when it is necessary but also when I stand to gain more. I will be on time. I will be at the right place. I will be specific, I will be intentional. I will be purposeful. I will enrich myself, and impact those around me. I will be a leader of men.

The potential in me will rise and lead me in all I do. When I see myself, I will see someone who is been purposeful. I will be instrumental to the world around me starting with my affiars.

I will be financially respobsible, and my debts will be paid off this year. To listen more to the inner voice which always seem to be right... after the fact. To say what is on my mind to the point but sibtle. To say NO, when appropriate and when not for good measure.

By the way, This is not my new years resolution.

falo português

2007-12-24T14:27:00.000-05:00

A couple days ago I was on my flight from DC to LA. This is after I miseed my initial flight due to pver sleep. I couldnt help but push the snpoze button, like every five mnutes until I turned off the alarm. iI sat by this young kid, his mom nad brother were on the other side of the isle, his father up towards the front of the plane.

I thought to talk to him but I had the moment pass, didnt even know where to start but soon he had to wake me up at the suggestion of the hostess. They wanted me to eat snacka by force. And the there the conversation began. It turned out he was from Brazil and speak portuguese and not English. I speak English not Portuguese. The drama ensued but soon I was surprised. With the huge language barier we managed to have a conversation going albeit stressed.

I have never in my life used fragments to communicate. He asked me how many hours to go on the flight (it was a 5 hour flight) and did so without English of course and somehow I was able to tell him, with gestures of the fingers, not the middle one. It was a great time, we discussed his stay in the US, he thought me a couple Portuguese words, I forgot what he called snow, that one too a while. He wanted to ask if it snowed in L.A., and his hand gestures did not help much. He had to reah over to his mom who then told me the meaning of the word.

You kow what I found out, when all else fails, talk about football. No not American football, the real football as known all around the world. His face lit up, and we had a magnificent discussion. His face lit up like an incadescent light bulb, and he even showed me his team on his IPOD, mentioned a couple of his football idols. The flight ended, finally anf thankfully - I was getting cranky from it all - and we shook hands as we departed. Him off to Disneyworld I think, me off to a wedding (owanbe style).

I got to thinking, if women speak a different language than men do, would I be as successfull with them as with this young man by using hand gestures. Maybe not; besides I dont suppose football is as romantic to open them up.

Question

2007-11-09T18:15:00.000-05:00

What does a man do when he comes to a point in his life where he starts to ask the difficult questions and finds that ...........
He has missed more opportunities than he has seized because he was afraid he would fail and then failed by default ?

Memories 1

2007-11-08T16:21:00.001-05:00

A long while back, I will say I was about 7 or 8 years old, probably younger, I was home with my mom. I had a coloring book and with my mom watching and helping I shaded the pages with my pencil. It was more like practising puttin in shadows on a object in my painting paper now that I think about it. Well my aunty came in, yes one of those neighboorhood friends that becomes your aunty by extension, and she gave me a box of crayons. My eyes widened. Now I dont know exactly why I never had crayons then, but I will come to have many more from my parents later on in life they became a nuisance. That day, I started to put colors on my painting book, and it came alive. But somewhere deep within I felt guilt. The guilt that what my mom offered was not enough. I now look back, she didnt care much it seems, to her it was just all the same. Either I used a pencil or the crayons I was just offered. She was just happy I had something to do, and I bet an activity we can do together.

Ma, you may never get to read this, but Thank You for all the "pencils" you gave me, and the "crayons" you never seemed to mind.

Nigger, or is it Niggar?

2007-11-01T16:25:00.000-04:00

Nigger this nigger that. Or like the subject, is it Niggar. Interesting one black dude once said to me, "Hey nigger" and when I protested he said I was pronouncing it wrong. He apparently said "Niggar not nigger." Apparently, did I use that word already, there is a difference. Whnite folks use the latter, black folks the former. Tomato, tomato.

This morning I hear "dog" - the lead in a bounty hunter program - called his son's girlfriend a nigger. And now he wants to apologise. Actually, he did already. Why is it that white people always want to apologise when they are caught calling blacks derogatory words such as "niggers". They apologise and want to talk to black leaders about how to amend, heal, and appease. Dont talk to the leaders, talk to the people. Isiah Washington called a homosexual a faggot. And he apologised and went through a healing process, which really didnt stop him from saying it again.

Speak your mind. Admit you did wrong, not becuase you are caught and the whole world found out and now you dream up excuses. If no one heard the tape for 20 years would he apologise or tell on himself.

Why is everyone apologizing? Why are we looking for healing? I dont know them and I dont know their life stories. But the truth comes out in anger, in fun, in a drunken rage and in time of peace. Because, a man's heart is his core. What he bears in it will come to the surface when he is himself. I hope for you and me, we will conquer our inner demons and rise above "those things that easily beset us."

Trust

2007-11-01T14:24:00.001-04:00

This flowed better in my head when I was thinking about it, but that was hours ago. SO lets see if I can recreate the master piece that is my thought process.

In this part of the world where I live, might bee the same everywhere else but I wouldnt know that, it is expected when sunmitting applications for service to put down the name of your work place, so they know u are been paid, and then the amount you make, so they know u can afford the service. They even ask for your Social Security Number SSN - Nigerians have dubbed this Shola Shola - is a form of id # which some people think is akin to the mark of the beast itself - 666. Of course before one applies, they go through the process of investigation aka internet profile, they ask their many friends questiins about the service provider and what not. The service provider, most often, in turn gives their information to a third party to verify the provided information. Only God the All Seeing knows what those ones do with the free information. By the way, you often pay to give this information also known as the application process. By the way, did I say your life can be changed based on given out your SSN, we wont dive into this who knows who is reading.

It amazes me though based on this information that even I give out, how many of my friends dont know certain things about me. Like my SSN for instance. I mean you can look up my grades in school with this, why would I want you ton know which class I failed. I have a friend who would not tell anyone his date of birth, when I finally read it off his driver licence I still was not so sure. I go to events and not so often will I tell anyone where I work, well outside of that they start to raise their eyebrows, its just better. If a stranger company knows how much I earn, can you tell me why my girlfriend shouldnt know or vice versa? Ha, that was a trick question. You are thinking well I dont want him or her to judge me on that or have them know what I can afford. Did I tell you that whether you get an apartment or not, or the security deposit you pout down often depends on how much you make. They just judged you. I got a 10 on my apartment application, and you should have seen my apt manager smile so broadly. Well you girlfriend/boyfriend may not smile becos you make a few change less than they do, but again, why should I trust someone I may never see again and hide information from those close to me?

Well thats my rant for the day. I am still developing my style of writing. Perhaps it made sense to you. What are your thoughts.

Psychic?

2007-07-18T14:16:00.000-04:00

Some strange events have taken place for me. For instance knowing things I have not come across before, similar to deja vu, except for say me knowing names of people I have never met. Or how a device works, and I just simly known it, even though I never say anything. Hmm, if the machinery takes off ones hand I dont want to be blamed. Jokes aside though, a couple of weeks back, a name kept on coming into my mind. Admittedly, I heard it before. In church too. But it never once bothered me, and I did not know who exactly it was. Well it was the surname, or lastname as the americans know it by. Fast forward to lastweek Monday and the name grew intense in my mind. I walked a few block around my work building and saw a face and there was an instant connection to it. Like I knew the lady from somewhere. After the usual greeting, I aasked the name and it was... yes the one thats been on my mind. I didnt attached the name to her face at first when I saw her, neither had it crossed my mind.

I walked away not even realizing it until a couple of minutes later. Thats the name I have been pndering on but why. This type incidences have occured for as far as I can recal. I thought of a device, which if I had gone ahead to design it and make it, you can call me an inventor. No. A few months later found it already existed. A random word that I have not been aware of its existence can come up to my mind, and someone will use it withing a couple of days. But why did I meet the lady and why would her last name stick to my mind (she is married so its not like... I digress). I dont know if there is more to this type occurences, or its me pushing it out too far, but if only you knew what I have seen.

I can tell when I am in trouble, or when a situation is about to take a turn. Without looking I once sensed a lady with a child was agonizing having to get up to pick stuff up from a table. I just picked it up automatically and handed it to her, not even knowing why, and needless to say she was taken aback herself. She asked me how I knew. I dont know I just felt I needed to do it. Like I read it in her. Would I have this feeling when I meet the one? Certainly would make it easier, but with this track record of not paying attention, hmm... nevermind. I know the answers to exam questions I have not seen, wish I had paid attention. TMI, right there.

Well I move forward...

A life

2007-07-07T00:08:00.000-04:00

...It's the shit that happens while you are waiting for moments that never come.

-- Freamon, The Wire.

David Gray

2007-07-06T12:12:00.001-04:00

Gray, David

2007-07-06T11:57:00.000-04:00

This song's been on my mind a few days now. At first, it was just the tune of it. Couldnt even catch a word of it in my mind. Just over and over again, and while looking for another song, I came upon it. Now usually when a song wont stop playing in my head, its usually because I dont know the title or cant remember the lyrics. Once I do it goes away, but not this song. It stays, been almost 4 -5 days. I guess thats the my mood for now.

Here I Am...!

2007-07-05T12:11:00.000-04:00

Something has to be said for spontaneity; the absence of premeditation. Just talked to a friend, F. She was much hungry and repeated it a couple of times. I suppose I would have stood to the occasion if I had suggested she come for lunch but I had much to many questions. And of course I got rebuked for it, she wondered why the questions. I saw that a spontaneous action would much have been favoured. For a certain, been spontaneous excludes the constant inquiry or an abundance of questioning. So with that in mind, I put aside my barrage of questions to myself: what would I write, would anyone read, would anyone find it, should I be annonymus, how do I advertise it, why should I be writing, can I keep it up, would it make any sense... Maybe I should just write and in time who knows? The saying "time will tell" is true, but no one has ever suggested how. It seems you just step out there, see what happens. This is the first leg out. Peek outside, look around the corner, the horizon as far as the eyes can see. Is it safe? Perhaps not, giving how thought tranforms itself, and maintains a steady flow once it starts. Take a breadth, sigh, walk out... Here I am...!